With Apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Everyone Who Loves Anoles

Some would say there is a glorious history of anole-inspired poetry; others would say there is a history. But everyone can agree that it has been brief. Regardless, the best—and worst—of this work has been featured on Anole Annals (and nowhere else*). Last week, with multiple looming grant and paper deadlines, plus a lecture (or two or three) to write, I didn’t anticipate adding to this history (after reading the below, you’ll be glad that it is, now, history). However, I did open Twitter which is a pretty good sign that I was running out of useful ways to procrastinate. Near the top of my feed was this tweet/reply combo from Ken Feeley and James Stroud:

Without question, these are both great titles, but they brought another to my mind:

Anolis, how do I love thee?”

Having begun, and with procrastination as my muse, I couldn’t stop there and leave the thing unfinished. But, before you read further, if you’re not familiar with the famous poem whose title I have modified (i.e. ruined), you can read it here. It may help make sense of what follows (or maybe not). Regardless, to the memory of Elizabeth Barrett Browning and all appreciators of beautiful (or any other kind of) literature, I am deeply sorry.

Anolis, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My lasso can reach, when clinging out of sight
For the ends of twigs and trunk and grass.
I love thee to the level of every day’s
Sampling size, by sun and head-light.
I love thee freely, as we strive for statistics right.
I love thee purely, as they remain robust.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old hypothesis, and with my co-author’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost data. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if the AE choose,
I shall but love thee better after the reviews.

 

So there it is. You may tolerate it or hate it. No on agrees on literature (very loosely defined) anyway. However, if there’s one thing we can agree on, it is that the whole thing is James Stroud’s fault (just kidding, James, I take full responsibility).

I posted the ‘poem’ on Twitter and so it is only fitting that Twitter should have the last word. Thus, I’ll leave you with this reply to my tweet from one of my past PhD students, which I think sums up the whole experience rather nicely:

*This isn’t actually true, but hey – artistic license. It turns out anole poetry has featured elsewhere and the history hasn’t been that brief either: https://www.anoleannals.org/2012/07/11/anole-poetry/

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2 Comments

  1. John Metz

    I mentioned yesterday re an increase in reddish orange colored brown anoles. I forgot to mention that I’ve spotted two green anoles in two different locations, about an mile apart. What’s makes it interesting is that they were the biggest green anoles I’ve ever seen. I didn’t measure them but they were actually huge as compared to the ones I grew up seeing here in central coastal Florida, the Edgewater area.

  2. John Metz

    ….in addition, is it possible that besides living higher in trees, are the greens becoming larger due to an evolutionary response to the almost overwhelming number of browns?

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